So I’m one exam away from summer and I’m packing up the massive amount of STUFF I’ve accumulated this year. I’m leaving with so much more than I came with.
(Get ready for a metaphor.)
But I’ve gained a whole lot more than just material stuff this year. I was amazed at how much growing I did last year but I think this year could rival last year. For my own records and for your reading pleasure here’s a list of the immaterial, irreplaceable growing experiences that occurred and are ongoing from the ’08-’09 school year:
~I have learned to be satisfied in my relationship with God. It’s okay to be alone with him. This satisfaction, I will admit, comes and goes sometimes. But it’s there when I need it the most.
~My internship with the Coalition for New South Carolinians showed me that it is possible to combine passion with profession. It was so rewarding to be a part of something that seeks real progress in the community. After this, I know that my future involves serving and advocating for people in some way.
~I was rejected from the International Business program at USC. I count this as a victory. It hurt. But I recognize now that it was exactly what I needed to move on and pursue the life that God has planned for me. I know that I’m not made for the corporate world, that God has called me to minister to the needy of the world. And he’s equipping me to do that. I guess I just had to run into a wall to discover the open door on the other side of the room.
~I have begun to pursue a lifestyle of loving people. It’s never really been my nature to be a caring, sympathetic person, but I find that the more I emulate Jesus, the more natural it becomes.
~Lastly, I’ve decided to dedicate my summer to service in Peru. It seemed like a sacrifice at first, a sacrifice of my time, and a sacrifice of money. I could’ve been working my way through the summer, so I wouldn’t have to work during the school year. But that thought process was completely wrong. It is my PRIVELIDGE to serve the Lord and the people He created and I should be thanking him for to the opportunity to serve. God isn’t lucky because I’ve decided to commit to Him. I’m lucky, immeasurably lucky, because He loves me, because He forgives me, because He gives me the opportunity to participate in His love.
Well there you have it. I’m sure I have forgotten to mention many things. It seems like a bunch of random things, random changes, but they are all nudges in the same direction for me. So I’ve decided to run full force in the direction God’s been nudging, to run the race he’s marked out for me. It’s kind of scary, but mostly exciting.
I woke up one morning and realized I’m growing up with each day, little by little. And I realized that the little things about the future that had been scaring me, well they’d already passed me by. I guess I just expected Growing Up to be an event, something that happened fast . . . like puberty (but less awkward). But it’s more like years of figuring things out and getting over heartaches and failures. That’s Growing Up. And I’m sure I’ve only just begun, but it’s definitely happening.